ICEMlSym(R7A) of Mesorhizobium loti is an integrative and conjugative element (ICE) that confers the ability to form a nitrogen-fixing symbiosis with Lotus species. Horizontal transfer is activated by TraR and N-acyl-homoserine lactone (AHL), which can stimulate ICE excision in 100% of cells. However in wild-type cultures, the ICE is excised at low frequency. Here we show that QseM, a widely-conserved ICE-encoded protein, is an antiactivator of TraR. Mutation of qseM resulted in TraR-dependent activation of AHL production and excision, but did not affect transcription of traR. QseM and TraR directly interacted in a bacterial two-hybrid assay in the presence of AHL. qseM expression was repressed by a DNA-binding protein QseC, which also activated qseC expression from a leaderless transcript. QseC differentially bound two adjacent operator sites, the lower-affinity of which overlapped the -35 regions of the divergent qseC-qseM promoters. QseC homologues were identified on ICEs, TraR/TraM-regulated plasmids and restriction-modification cassettes, suggesting a conserved mode of regulation. Six QseC variants with distinct operators were identified that showed evidence of reassortment between mobile elements. We propose that QseC and QseM comprise a bimodal switch that restricts quorum sensing and ICEMlSym(R7A) transfer to a small proportion of cells in the population.